I love these low-key happy birthdays.

Matthew turned 4 yesterday. His brothers woke up remembering it was his birthday and sang to him immediately (not the you-smell-like-a-monkey version!). I think he got everything he wanted – at least he says he did:

• Ice cream for breakfast!
• Pop sicles at his last day of camp in the morning!
• Oma and Opa and friends visiting! (Including best friend Anneke – the little monkeys!)
• A new Indiana Jones Wii game – just what he wanted – thanks Nana and Shana!
• Phone calls from grandparents, uncles and aunts! (Sorry to everyone who caught him when he was more interested in his new Wii game than in talking to them…. does anyone have pointers on that? Ideas about how to remind them that family is more important than video games? (I’m serious – I’m taking notes if anyone has any….)
• Requested dinner chicken parmesan!
• Presents to open!
• Birthday cake with sprinkles and with 4 candles plus 1 to grow on to blow out and sparklers too!

Last year for Matthew’s birthday we were in the High Sierra Nevada, near the San Francisco  Sierra Nevada Field Campus. Grandma Penny and Grandpa Jim rented a BEAUTIFUL cabin and we had great adventures.

But we forgot cake! SO we decorated a platter with oreos (don’t tell daddy), m&m’s, blueberries and 2 table candles!

That was another low-key but happy birthday.

I think I really confused Matthew yesterday morning though. We had all told him over and over that 3 was almost over and that he would turn 4. He knew it the second he woke up that – he was thrilled to be 4!

However, it can be very hard for a mommy to see her little babies growing up up up! In March I told Jared he was not allowed to turn 6 and enter real boyhood from little-boyhood. He thought this was very funny.

Yesterday morning as he crawled into our bed where his whole family was waiting for him, I told Matthew that he had to stay 3 because I didn’t want him to turn 4, he freaked out! He started yelling at me and he  actually looked scared – like somehow I had ripped the fabric of time and it was all so unfair.

If I only I had the power to control time! Of course, for now he doesn’t have to know I can’t. For a little while longer Glen and I can be omnipotent. Although, for the Lipka boys 4 has traditionally been the age where they challenged that notion with every fiber of their being. We’re in for a fun year!

This delicious super food recipe is a great way to get spinach into your children. It came to me from my friend Sheila Dickinson’s Berry Boy Smoothie in the ECPC Cook Book and from Darcie’s friend Amy who amazed me by getting Matthew to drink a green smoothie.

My amalgamation of these recipes create a delicious purple smoothie. The spinach is completely hidden by the strong color of the blueberry.

1 cup OJ

1.5 – 2 cup raw spinach

1 cup vanilla NF yogurt

1 cup frozen blueberries

Mix in blender. Add OJ if it’s too thick.

Drink while it’s fresh! It sort of deteriorates after about 20 minutes – then you can see the spinach! Also, clean it up soon after eating! Don’t leave the cups or blender to sit. They’re much easier to clean if you do it right away!

Matthew: Why did the chicken cross the road?

Any random person he can get to answer: Why?

Matthew: Because it went across the road and into the house. It went in the bathroom and sat on the toilet. It went pee and poo. Then the little boy came in and pushed it down the toilet and flushed the toilet and it said “aaaaah! aaaaaaah! aaaaah!”

(Matthew and Jared can incorporate potty humor in any joke. How naive I was to think that since Ethan never engaged in potty talk that I would get to miss it altogether…. *sigh*)

———————

Matthew: Knock knock

Anyone around: Who’s there?

Matthew: Interrupting cow

Anyone: Interrupting co…….

Matthew: MOOOO!

Courtesy of Erin Coady

———————-

Then Glen tried to expand on the interrupting cow to interrupting chicken or interrupting pig. Matthew LOVED this idea. But he couldn’t execute it!  He’d say – interrupting pig, and then he’d say MOOO by accident instead of OINK! And each time he’d smack his forehead and laugh and laugh, exclaiming – oh no! or Doh! or Hey!

He tried about 20 times before he finally got it. He did NOT give up.

Or not sleepy enough?

Matthew and Jared both took pretty long naps the other day, and for the first time I can remember, they couldn’t fall asleep that night!

They tiptoed into our room twice. “Our tummy hurts,” they said in unison.

“You share a single tummy? It’s the collective tummy?” we teased.

I went to check on them and both children were lying next to each other in Jared’s bed. They didn’t hear me sneak to the door and poke my head in. By the light of the snowflake lights, Jared was reading Go Dog Go! to Matthew.

It was SO CUTE!!!

With Ethan out of the room, Jared gets to take on the role of big brother. I think he’s enjoying it.

Jared: “Mom, what’s today?”

Matthew: “I think it’s Monday.”

Mommy: “That’s right Matthew, it’s Monday! Nice!”

Matthew: “YES!” (makes fists as if the JETS just won the Super Bowl and smiles the biggest smile)

It’s the little triumphs in life that make the difference.

Nana was concerned that there wasn’t enough room in the boys’ bedroom for all of their clothes. I hadn’t replaced the diaper changing table with something that would fit the larger clothes that Matthew wears now. She also felt that having a guest room in a small home was a waste of space. It doesn’t get used often enough and we don’t have enough room otherwise.

The biggest drawback was our music. The room also served as the music room where I could practice singing and the boys could play drums and sometimes work with me on rudimentary music theory. Also, the room served as our library and we would have to find a new place for all of our books.

We have moved Ethan into his own room now! We bought some bureaus for clothes in both rooms. We are slowly trying to remove the extra things in Ethan’s room to make it his own. Ethan loves having a place to put all of his sports and chess trophies. Jared and Matthew are happy with their new bureau. Matthew picks his clothes out every morning and brings them to me to dress him without being asked!

All in all, I miss my music. But I think the psychological benefits of splitting up the boys at this time are more important.

I hope Glen makes millions of dollars soon to buy a 5 bedroom with a music room/library. Then we could have a guest room AND a place for me to sing AND each boy could have his own room. Nana thinks we could afford that in Florida without millions of dollars and she said she’d do all of our laundry if we moved to Florida!

Glen likes it here though. A lot. Something about people in line at Starbucks talking processing speeds.

(You better like it here honey – I figure we need at least $2 million to buy a house the size we need – $1 million down payment on a $1.5 million house, plus a million in the bank to earn the money we’ll need for taxes and upkeep!!! And that’s not even in the neighborhoods I’d like!)

While one can expect Disneyland to be fun, I didn’t realize that my children would grow from the experience.

Ethan had never been on the big, adult roller coasters. He had never had the chance. He loved every minute of them! He not only went on the fastest roller coasters there, like California Screamin (which includes a loop de loop!) but even on Tower of Terror – 13 stories free fall! Thank goodness for Uncle Daniel who accompanied Ethan on most of these rides.

Ethan’s favorite rides: Tower of Terror, California Screamin, Indiana Jones

Jared was terrified of many of the rides. After trying the Matterhorn early on the first day, which is very jerky and has “scary sounds,” he was really nervous about getting on any but the mildest rides. Over the next 2 days he found the courage to try some rides that scared him, particularly Orange Stinger and Mulholland Madness at California Adventure Park, and actually enjoyed them! The thrill for him was not how much fun he was having on the rides like Ethan, but in how proud he was in himself that he had conquered his fear. I could see a huge change in him during that trip and in the weeks since. Conquering that fear at Disneyland gave him new confidence in himself. And it made him happier.

Jared’s Favorite Rides: Orange Stinger, Pirates of the Carribean, Peter Pan (he especially enjoyed Uncle Daniel’s commentary during this ride), Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride, Gadget’s Go Coaster, Mulholland Madness, Redwood Creek Challenge Trail

Daniel also had to draw on character in this story. On the last night, as we sat lined up on the curb watching the Electric Parade, Daniel reached back to get his video camera and threw his back out. It was awful. He was in such pain and couldn’t move. On our last vacation with him, everyone in the house except Lindy threw up in the space of 48 hours. Then he had a kidney stone and Bapu had to rush him to the E.R. I hope he doesn’t decide not to visit us anymore, although I could hardly blame him! WE LOVE YOU UNCLE DANIEL!

Uncle Daniel’s Favorite Rides: ???

Aunt Lindy and I both had some favorites from childhood, including The Tiki Room, which wasn’t such a hit this time around.

Nana’s Favorite Ride: Definitely NOT the Toon Town Roller Coaster, Gadget’s Go Coaster

Aunt Lindy’s Favorite Rides: FROM AUNT LINDY: “My favorite thing about disneyland is reliving my childhood experience with molly and the lipka boys- it’s so fun to share all the things i loved so much as a child with them. Altho i’m sorry i had to miss it i’m SO happy that they got to see the electric parade – for me that counts as a ride. My other favorites are Pirates of the Carribean, the Jungle Cruise and the Tiki Room. The Tiki room appeals to me not just because it’s pseudo historical- it opened in 1963 and retains it’s 1963 cultural references- i also like the corny jokes, the family friendliness and the international flavor. I am also a big fan of Space Mountain (the inclines and declines are just right for me and it’s like an intergalactic chiropractic adjustment). It was closed this time- perhaps next time all the kids will be tall enough to accompany me!”

Note to Aunt Lindy: if we go again as soon as I’d like, they won’t be tall enough yet!!!

My Favorite Rides: Soarin’ Over California (you really felt like you were flying! I loved it!!!), Peter Pan, Orange Stinger, Storybook Land Canal Boats (we went at dusk and it was so picturesque)

Everyone’s Least Favorite Ride: The Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage (even though Lindy worked some of her Lindy magic and got all 9 of us jumped to the head of the line with no wait! How does she do it?) Ethan was like – there’s the surface of the water right there above our heads! This thing is not submerged!!!

One of the best things about Disneyland is the quality of all those characters walking around in flesh and blood: we saw Mickey Mouse, Goofy, Prince Caspian riding on a horse, Ariel, Sleeping Beauty…. They are amazing! They are so impeccably dressed and made up. Their mannerisms are so detailed and well-rehearsed.

Molly was in love with the princesses. She even came dressed as one! We went to Storybook Theater and got to hear Sleeping Beauty tell her own story! She was perfect! Even the Lipka boys were entranced! Then Molly and Matthew got to take a lesson with these court people on prince and princess etiquette, and they did a dance. Molly went to a special lunch where Ariel came and wished her happy birthday.

Molly’s Favorite Rides: FROM MOLLY: “Well, I liked the rollercoaster which went slow and i liked the one which went FAST! I liked it because my cousins went on that rollercoaster with me. I also liked the carousel when i rode on the elephant and the ride where the ceiling was coming down i was a little bit scared. And the one where i was in the jungle.”

Matthew got to meet Mickey Mouse and take a picture with him at his house in Toon Town. I don’t think Matthew has ever seen a Mickey Mouse cartoon, but he was IN LOVE with Mickey Mouse from the moment we got to Disneyland. Late in the afternoon of our 2nd day we waited in line for about 15 minutes to get to meet Mickey Mouse in his studio and then we went into a room with about 5 other families. All of the other children looked nervous and uncertain and were clinging to their parents. Not Matthew! He ran up to Mickey and gave him a big hug.

Matthew’s Favorite Rides: Pirates of the Carribean, Dumbo, Jumping Jellyfish, Gadget’s Go Coaster, Mickey’s House Read the rest of this entry »

We had a blast at Disneyland. I had no idea it would be such a great trip!

When Aunt Lindy invited all her nearest and dearest to a Disneyland birthday for Molly (all 7,000 of us – she has a lot of friends! , I thought, what a perfect occasion to celebrate Molly’s birthday and take the boys on their first trip to Disneyland! Since Molly lives in Connecticut we don’t get many opportunities to celebrate her birthday WITH her. And without a good excuse to go to Disneyland, I didn’t know if we’d ever go!

Glen was less enthusiastic about it, and had just missed a week of work for Jessica’s Bat Mitzvah, so I convinced NANA to come accompany us!!! Nana is the PERFECT companion. Having her on a trip is even better than having her at your house doing laundry and re-orging your closets (Shana and Mikey, I know you hear me! . She didn’t complain in the car, she was amenable to everything everyone wanted to do and she likes to pay for things. Seriously, we ALL had more fun because Nana was there.

Honestly, the kids are SO LUCKY to have such loving family all around them. This trip was amazing solely because of, but could have been disastrous without, the support of Nana, Aunt Lindy, Uncle Daniel and Carol Greenwald. On the first day at Disneyland we had 5 adults for 4 children. Without that ratio the experience would have been different for my children. But it wasn’t just their presence – Aunt Lindy and Uncle Daniel engage with their nephews in the most loving ways. They are attentive and generous and you can just tell the kids know they are loved.

Carol, Lindy’s step-mom, was of course there as the adoring grandmother of the birthday girl. But that didn’t stop her from taking a side trip with Jared when the Matterhorn freaked him out. And as we know, Jared is not easy to get along with when he’s freaked out! But Carol turned him right around.

Poor Nana! She was the one who sat with the strollers while Molly and Matthew took 2 hour naps in strollers. She was the one watching all of our stuff while everyone else was on a ride. She was the one who almost took Matthew’s hand off from gripping it so hard on the 30 second Tune-Town kiddie roller coaster ride that Molly rode over and over again with her hands in the air!!! Nana had the patience of a saint, as always.

I’ll post separately about each child’s experience, because for each of them it really WAS a magical kingdom. Who knew?

Smile Disaster

Ethan’s smile took a hit yesterday, but was then glued back on. About 15 minuted before the end of Little League practice, a ball took a funny hop and whacked off half of his two front teeth. Literally about 50%. It looked like the outline of the ball to me. Glen described it to the children’s dentist as an “upside down smile.” (Later the dentist said to me, that was a great description although Glen may not have realized it was. I didn’t bother to tell Dr. Lau that, no, Glen thinks all of his descriptions are great. (And they are honey.)

At first it looked like just his lip was fat, but then they realized the teeth were gone. Luckily 2 of his teammates found the 2 pieces. I was away picking up Glen, but also luckily, friend and fellow CPNS board member Eleni Hulman was there and she called me on my cell and gave me the news right away. Ethan was crying and pretty scared and upset. All of the parents who were there and our fantastic Coach Barney Fahey were so caring and concerned – I really appreciated knowing Ethan had that love and support around him when I wasn’t there.

At first Glen and I thought we would wait until the next day to go see the dentist because dental is SO expensive and emergency anything is SO expensive and it all comes out of our HSA. But we looked online and decided to call Ethan’s dentist, Dr. Terrence Lau.

He is a GREAT dentist. Pediatric dentistry has come so far from when I was a kid, but Dr. Lau is really outstanding. He also charges an arm and a leg and we haven’t seen him for a year because our insurance had changed. Luckily, it recently changed back. He really makes the children feel at ease, explaining everything he is doing and using language that is accessible and safe. When he gives a shot he doesn’t let them see the needle; he just explains that he has to hold the lip so can see and sometimes it might feel like he is pinching too hard because the lip is so slippery to hold on to, so just tell him. That kind of calming technique and the movie (last night was Surf’s Up which Ethan had never seen) on the ceiling really made Ethan feel at ease.

We called Dr. Lau at 6:45 and he told us to meet him at the office – he would drive back from SF. And over the next 2 hours, with no help, he carefully and meticulously bonded Ethan’s missing pieces back onto the stubs. The medical prognosis is good, but we’re not out of the woods. If the nerves in the teeth are damaged, they could die and then Ethan will need a root canal. He put medicine directly on the teeth and also prescribed an antibiotic. He said we could still go to Disneyland next week.

Can’t Stop Smiling

Matthew is a smiler. He smiles all day long. He is always smiling! Almost all of his expressions include smiles. He has his angry look, where his mouth and eyes are smiling but he wrinkles his nose and forehead. He has his surprised look where he opens his eyes and mouth as wide as he can, but the corners of his mouth are still hinting at happy. He has his scared look, where he shakes his head slightly and hunches his shoulders and blinks his eyes, but is still smiling.

Smile though your heart is breaking – learning to smile again

4 was a hard year for Jared. His last year of preschool was really difficult and Jared somehow came to the belief that the world was against him. For a while he could find nothing to be happy about. I would ask him to name some good things that happened to him at the end of the day and he couldn’t.

That’s when I started the behavior modification. That included chocolate in the morning if he could name good things before he went to sleep at night. (Some might call that a bribe, but I call it conditioning.) It also included smile therapy. I felt like I had to teach him how to smile all over again. Opposite of Matthew, he seemed to not allow himself to smile under any circumstances. Now he knows that his smiles are a gift he can give me every day, and he showers me with the gift of his smiles first thing every morning and throughout the day.

We’re still working on the whole world-is-against-me belief, but we’ll get there.